Finding the Perfect Gift: Five Questions to Ask Yourself

Giving the perfect gift to a special person is something that requires thought. And not much of the latter–thinking–is happening anymore in a wired world where searching for gifts ideas can be done with a click of a mouse button.

“It’s the thought that counts” is a lousy excuse for giving a present that hardly has meaning for the recipient. Sure, everyone enjoys receiving gifts, both big and small. It is a big ego-booster that makes you think, “Awwww, that’s sweet. You’re thinking of me.” And that’s usually the end of it. The present usually ends up in some lonely corner on a shelf or in some dark, musty spot in the closet. It is hardly the perfect gift. It’s not just the thought (of the person or of giving something to that person) that counts. The thought put into selecting the perfect gift also matters much.

When looking for gifts ideas for your special person, what thoughts need to run in your mind? Here are the most important ones, arranged in order of importance. Personalised Birthday CardsĀ 

Why are you giving a present?

People give gifts for various reasons. In the modern, materialistic world, the most common reason is self-gain. A lot of people actually give presents without consciously knowing that self-gain is the underlying motive:


  • “I’m giving you a gift so you will like me or think better of me.”
  • “I’m giving you a present because it makes me feel nice about myself.”
  • “I’m giving you presents that will remind you of me and how much I care.”
  • …and the like. You get the idea.

This kind of giving is a one-way street. Only the giver stands to benefit from it. In this kind of giving, the giver is simply giving back to himself or herself–the recipient is merely an instrument to the selfish act.


There’s another type of giving–one that places the recipient before the giver. This, for me, is what true giving is all about. Thoughtful giving is an other-centered phenomenon. You think of what the recipient will gain from the gift long before you even start thinking of what you yourself will gain from it. You give for the sake of the receiver–that is true generosity.

Thoughtful giving requires you to examine your motives for giving the perfect gift. If you want to master the art of thoughtful giving, you need to see giving from a different mindset, a different viewpoint, a different lens. That is where all true giving starts.

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